OUTLINE
00:00 – Welcome & Erin’s journey into money mindset
01:30 – The conflict between old identity vs. new self
04:20 – Why identity shifts are normal and necessary
06:00 – The “old self” and how she shows up in money & life
08:10 – 3 steps to becoming her: awareness, ritual, replacement
10:50 – Compassion over shame: releasing with love
12:00 – Doorway visualisation exercise & closing
THE ERIN DAVIS SHOW
Hi, I'm Erin Davis. Your money mindset and grounded rich girl coach. I'm an accountant, so I get the numbers, but what really lights me up is helping women lean into that version of a rich girl life. So the grounded rich girl is a movement. It's a community of women who want to feel calm and confident and in control of their money and in control of their lives. I know what it's like to feel stuck on someone else's schedule, always doing the right things, but never feeling quite free, feeling like something is missing. These days, my calendar includes lots of trail runs through the bush, ocean walks when I can get there, and a lot more slow time, not because I have to, but because I can. The only way I've been able to do this is to be able to get my money sorted. So I help everyday women on an everyday girl income, live like a rich girl. I work with women to move from financial stress and overwhelm to that really clear confidence, because getting good with money isn't about restriction, it's about flexibility, spaciousness, self, trust and building a rich girl life that actually feels rich. And so today's episode, we are stepping into her. We are becoming her, letting go of that old version of you and stepping into that new version, because this month has all been about that identity, that self trust, and becoming her, because we are able to choose who we need to be and how we want to show up. But I remember a few years ago looking back in the mirror and realising that I just didn't quite recognise the woman staring back at me on the outside, everything looked great. I had the perfect job, perfect home, perfect husband, perfect kids.
But really on the inside, I felt like there was this tug of war. Parts of me were really clinging to that old version of who I'd always been, pretty much being in that victim mode. Poor me, very emotional and not really owning those parts of me who I wanted to become or what I wanted to become. So I worked really hard, played harder, and you know what? I actually tried to please everybody, because that's what I thought I needed to do. I did everything for everybody else, but I was sacrificing my own well being and what it is that I wanted. So when I was looking in the mirror, I had this realisation, this is not who I want to be, and this is not how I want to show up. So it was pretty scary and pretty terrifying, terrifying at the same time, because letting go of that old me felt like, you know, I was really stepping into the unknown, but freeing at the same time, because I knew deep down that I was stepping into a place that felt more right. And so in this episode today, I want you to really think about letting go of who you've been so you can finally step into becoming her. And here's something really powerful. Nearly half of the people, 45% say their identity has changed, changed significantly in the last five years. So if you feel like you're shifting or evolving or even questioning who you are, you're not weird, you're just human. But here's the trick, it's most of us cling on to that old version of ourselves because it feels safe, it feels familiar, it's predictable, even when we know deep down, it doesn't serve us anymore, or it doesn't fit, but that old version of us is what we've always known, and so it really takes a lot of courage to be able to realise that that old version that we're holding on to comes at a cost, And it's heavy, and it's like trying to run forward with, you know, a backpack full of rocks that you can still move, sure, but you're exhausted, you're stuck in the same cycles, and you never really truly feel free. So who exactly is this old self. You know, she's the one who makes choices from fear, from scarcity, from survival. She's that version of you that over spends to feel worthy, or she says yes to everything because she doesn't want to get anybody upset. It, or she hustles endlessly just to prove she's good enough, because her worth is attached to the money in the bank. She's weighed down by shame, by self doubt, by the feeling that no matter what she does, it is never enough. And this is something that I really struggled with. It felt like I was trying to do everything, but never felt like anything was good enough.
And you know what is the most important thing is that we don't need to shame her. We don't need to judge her. We don't need to be critical of her instead, we actually need to honour her, because she's got you here. She's got you to where you are now. You have survived 100% of the days that have come before you. She has helped you survive. She has taught you resilience. But now it is time to step into that new space of becoming her. And here's a really beautiful truth that that next version is not only possible for you, it's inevitable, and research shows that 60% of people change how they see themselves during a major life transition. So this could be things like starting a new job or becoming a parent, a new relationship, stepping into a new business chapter. But the thing is that that new identity and those identity shifts are a normal part of our human experience. So if you are feeling like you are ready to step into this new space, but you're not quite sure how to do it. It is not uncommon to have that identity shift. There is nothing wrong with you. It just means that you're ready for something else. And it's not selfish or strange, it's really just your evolution. It is your invitation to step into that new identity, this new self, that one that feels lighter, that one that feels calmer, that feels confident, more grounded and abundant. She knows her worth. She makes decisions from alignment and not fear. And this is what I mean when I say grounded.
Rich girls really do move differently because they have this knowing deep within themselves that they are enough just as they are, and that they get to choose how they show up. So how do we actually let go of her? Because this sometimes isn't always instant, instant. It is really a practice, and it's a choice we can come back to every single day. So step one is really that awareness, start noticing where that old version of you shows up. Is she in a room where she's making a money decision? Is she whispering to you in your ear that you're about to say yes to something you don't want to, are you holding yourself back from those opportunities? And just noticing is so powerful, because if we are wanting something different, we have to recognise that what we have right now is not serving us. So step two is a ritual to create a way to release her intentionally. This might be journaling, it might be a meditation movement or even a new money ritual. So it's like you're choosing not to buy something from guilt, but instead spending it in a way that feels aligned. And I really like that self regulation movement breaks for me, I feel so much better when I am able to move and I know that I make better decisions from that space. So think of a way that you can incorporate a new ritual into your everyday life. It doesn't have to be massive. You don't have to sit and journal and meditate for hours on end, but it can just be five minutes. It can be sitting down with a beautiful cup of tea before you go to bed, and tracking your spending for that day and anchoring it into something that you already love to do. But just add the new piece in there. And step three is the replacement. So every time you notice your old self creeping back in, you need to ask yourself, what would the woman I'm becoming do here? What does that grounded, rich girl version of myself do? And then take that one small action. And through all of these, I want you to feel real compassion for yourself. A lot of the work that I do is about creating change and changing relationships with money, but it also comes from a place of compassion and kindness to yourself.
We can't create change if we are hating ourselves for everything we've done in the past. So we need to give ourselves some compassion and kindness, because we don't want to shame her. We don't want to judge her. She did the very best she could at the time with the information we had that she had. So we thank her, we love her, and then we are able to release her. So here's what I want you to do, and here's what I want life to look like for you when you're stepping into that new ground of rich girl space, that new identity in your money you might find that you spend from guilt or impulse, but the new you comes from a place of intention and alignment and security. So in life, you might say yes to things that keep the peace, but the new you sets boundaries with grace and guidance and confidence. So these shifts are not huge and dramatic, but when one choice happens, one moment, one time during the day. Each time you make that choice and you take that action, you are actually stepping into becoming her. You are choosing her. And so the more we do it, the more we practice, the better we get. And so now I want to leave you with this little vision exercise. I want you to close your eyes for a moment, or just allow yourself to soften and imagine that you're standing in this doorway. On one side is the old version of you, the one that you've outgrown, and on the other side is that woman who you are becoming. So see her, feel her energy. Notice how grounded she is, how calm and confident she is. And now I want you to see yourself stepping through that doorway, leaving behind that old self that no longer serves you, and really stepping into that new rich girl identity of the woman you are becoming. So anchor yourself into this anchor with maybe an affirmation of I release what no longer serves me, because I am choosing to become her, because I know that when I do become her, I am going to feel safe and grounded and connected and confident. So thank you for being here today. I hope you've really enjoyed this episode. I'd love to hear from you, come and join us over in the grounded rich girl community, take the quiz, which I will put the link in the show notes. It is www.erindavis.com.au/groundedrichgirl and really enables you to step into that new rich girl identity. Because when you become her, you start to create a life that feels good and it feels right for you. Thanks for tuning in today. I really hope you enjoyed the show. If you did head over and subscribe and also leave me a review while you're there, I would love to read it. Don't forget to share this episode with your audience and tag me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/erindavismoney/ or https://www.erindavis.com.au/podcast where you'll find all of today's show notes and links. See you next week on the Erin Davis show you.