I want to start today with something I know that you will recognise you can be working really hard. Your money is coming in, your business is moving really well, and you still feel like you're one bill away from panic. The weird part is, you can't even explain it, because technically, you're doing really well. This is what happens when money becomes the thing you never quite look at because life is loud. You've got a lot going on, you're carrying a lot and being busy feels safer than being still,but you're not lazy. You're not careless. What you are though is unsupported, so this is why I run a free five day challenge every month. It's short, really a structured reset to help you stop avoiding instead, we get really clear, we feel really calm, and we put in place this momentum shifts that you need in order to get money back on track, but without the jargon, without the chaos, without the spreadsheets and without the shame. So if you're ready for this shift, let me know the details are waiting for you. We have a challenge starting next week, and I would love for you to be a part of it. If you're keen. The details are in the show notes, but it is something that I know creates a massive shift and starts you on that path of getting good with money.
So today's episode is all about the real reason you feel broke, even when you're earning really well. I just want to point out to start with, this is not an income problem. Instead, it's a nervous system issue and an attention problem. We can be sitting in this space of living a good life. We're not at rock bottom, but we're also not thriving. We're in this average 7 out of 10 life. Money's coming in. We're earning really well, but we're still feeling like we're living paycheck to paycheck, or week to week, month to month. We don't really have anything left over at the end of the pay cycle, and we are caught in this constant cycle of checking the bills, checking the account, trying to make everything balance, yet we are earning really, really well. And I just want you to know that this is a really dangerous place to sit, because you're not sitting at rock bottom. Rock bottom is that place where it's do or die. You need to make a change. You need to do something different. Otherwise, you know you could lose your house or you could lose your car. You can't make your repayments. The interest rates have gone up. You can't pay the electricity, you can't buy the groceries. That is when we are forced into action. It's that really scary space that I need to do something right now. Otherwise, we just can't keep going on.
But instead, you're sitting in this place where you've got money coming in, your bills being paid, you've got the house, you've got the holidays, you drive the car, you have the clothes, you can go out for brunch and not worry about it. You just spend willy nilly on everything that comes in without really giving it much of a thought. And I just want you to know that this place has been somewhere where I have sat for a very long time. I have earned good money, yet I was feeling like we were always chasing our tail. We were never getting ahead. We should have been further along than what we were. Both my husband and I earn good money, yet we were feeling like life was not happening quick enough for us, or the wealth creation was not happening enough. And the thing was that even though we were earning good money, we were not taking care of it, we were not being responsible. We were not being respectful to our money. We were not treating it with that care and respect. And I say that in a way that makes me feel a little uncomfortable and a little embarrassed, if I'm to be honest, because for so many years, I think we could have been doing things so differently. But you know what? We can't change what's happened in the past, but we can change what we do going forward, and how we show up for ourselves and living in that seven out of 10 average life space, it was not bad. It was not a bad life, yet behind closed doors, I was the one that was feeling very stressed and very responsible for our money and feeling the pressure of.
Well, how do I juggle this? I need to take money out of this account to pay these bills, but then I need to make sure money is back in the account to pay these other bills. And it was feeling like there was a juggle. I was just constantly moving money around, which then caused even more stress and overwhelm, because my accounts were a mess, and it was really just making sure that we had enough sitting in each account in order to pay the bills. And so while from the outside, it looked like everything was good and we were earning good money, that internal feeling and that heaviness and that weight that I was carrying was crippling. It was really, really hard. And I think being the accountant, I just took on that responsibility of, well, I do the finances in our house because that's just what I'm good at. I think we naturally gravitate to the things that we like to do and that we're good at, and so managing the money was something that I just naturally gravitated towards. It wasn't something forced upon me, yet I took responsibility for it. And so then that also created this extra heaviness, because I was then feeling responsible that we were not further ahead. And so what we needed to do was we needed to actually draw a line in the sand and decide, well, what is it that we want to do? How do we want to move forward? And this has been a process. It's been an evolution. It hasn't just been one minute we're doing this and then the next minute we're doing something completely different. In fact, it's been an evolution over the last few years, and the more that I pay attention to money, the more I get very specific on what it is that I want to achieve. I'm also then able to have these conversations with my husband, who is on the same page.
And now, in the past, we really haven't had discussions about money, because it was just something that I took care of. Yet, there were very different spending habits, which meant we were on different pages as well, what are we spending? What's important? What goals do we have? I don't think we even really had financial goals, which is a bit embarrassing to say, but we just kept going. We just kept tracking along as if everything was okay and everything was normal because we had the money to pay the bills. But the thing was, we were never getting further ahead. We were not building our wealth and creating it. And so when you don't look at the numbers, when you don't get very clear on what it is that you actually want, what these goals are, then it's really hard to actually lead your money and be in control of it, rather than it just coming and going as it pleases.
It feels really unsafe, it feels really heavy, and that really big burden because you're waiting for money to come in, but as soon as it comes in, it goes out very quickly. And so I know that you're smart and capable, but I also know that you're carrying a lot.
I know that avoidance isn't laziness, it's overwhelm. And for me, it was like, Well, how do I start? How do I change this? How do I move things around because I was wearing busy as a badge of honour. It was creating this illusion of control. But the thing was, it was actually really blocking me from generating income, holding income, holding wealth, our spending creating investments. It was really just blocking all of these things because I was stuck in this desperate cycle of needing to make money. I need to make this work. I need to have this in order to pay all, all of these bills and maintain this lifestyle which we've become accustomed to. And so when you talk about the circular space of money that it comes in, we receive it, we hold it, we generate it, we spend it. When we're talking about generating you earn it, but without clarity, you don't know what you actually need to bring in. So I needed to get very clear on, well, how much are we spending and how much do we need to open the front door? Jacquie Clark talks a lot about this, which there's an episode that I did with Jackie on the podcast, which was such an enlightening way of thinking about how we're spending and how we're how much we actually need to open our front door, which is such an important concept. So our spending was on autopilot. It was really that pressure valve that we could just let off at any time. You know, we'd have takeaway whenever we wanted. We'd go and do all of it.
The activities whenever we wanted. We never really said, Well, no, we can't do that, because that doesn't align with what's important to us. We were just really holding this day to day, but we didn't have a buffer. We didn't have this safety net in case something went wrong. And I really don't like to call it an emergency fund, because for me, that feels like a lack or that there's not enough, or we're waiting for something to go wrong. But instead, I have changed it to be this wealth creation account, like this buffer account of the building wealth account, because that is where we can grow some income, but also, too, we're covered if there's unexpected expenses. So I really needed to get comfortable with receiving money, letting money land without it just disappearing as soon as it arrived.
I know that smart women aren't behind, they're just unsupported. And that was the same for me. I am smart, I am capable, yet when it came to this stuff with money, I was really just not sitting in control with it. I was not leading the money and the decisions and having the conversations with my husband. So this week, actually, we have sat down. We have done our net worth again. We do this regularly. I probably do ours every six months now, and it's been a little while. So we sat down and we did that, and this time, I actually went through those numbers with him, and we talked about it. We talked about, well, what's the plan for the next six months? What is the goal that we want? And for the first time, I feel like we're actually both on the same page. We had a very open conversation. There were no accusations, there was no judgement, there was no shame, there was no putting each other down. It was really just an agreement about, well, what's important to us, how do we want to move and why do we want to do this? I think that has been a real shift, because we were able to, you know, come together on what's important to us.
I know that having access to money, having money coming in means that you have the supply, but always feeling broke means that you're not taking control of it. You're not deciding, or pre deciding, where you want to spend, how you want to spend, what's important to you. You're just being complacent. And I know that can feel a bit harsh at times, but sometimes we stick our head in the sand and go, Well, that's tomorrow's problem, or we'll just worry about that later. But the thing is, though, whatever we do now is going to impact tomorrow, and so if you are struggling to sleep at night, if you are worrying about retirement, if you are worried about having to live on the pension and government support in order to survive in your retirement. Then every single action you do now impacts what that future looks like for you. And so I want you to take some time to really just lean into well, what's important to you? I also want you to take five minutes and check in. Do a simple check in. We talk a lot about self care and have a massage, go for a walk, sit in the sun, have a cup of tea without the kids or any noise going on. But you know what self care can actually look like? How am I managing my finances? Taking five minutes to check my banking app, look at the last 10 transactions that you have. Notice any surprises? Are there any transactions there that you didn't know were actually there? Because there's a lot of things that just happen on automation through our bank accounts like we've set up a lot of direct debits, but when was the last time that you actually reviewed them and took notice of them?
I also want you to take notice of the emotions that are brought up when you look at those transactions. Now, these emotions are just signs. They are clues to how you're thinking and feeling, and we really need to tune into our body and listen to what it is that it is saying. Because when we can start to remove the emotion from money and we can just have our systems in place, have our processes and create this beautiful flow and momentum, we don't need to rely on emotion or motivation to make something happen, because we've already set up the process and the system. And so I want you to take 5 minutes to look at those last 10 transactions. Notice the surprises. Notice the emotions. Without the judgement, just really looking at the numbers. Now, this is a very important way to break down the fear. It's putting you back in the driver's seat. It creates that first drop of emotional money calm, which is just so important if you want to get good with money. And now I want you to tell me, what is it that you have found, what is it that you are feeling because I know that there are a lot of wealthy women who feel broke at the end of the week. And now, if this is you, and you are ready to take action. This is just information. It's not a problem. Okay?
I want you to realise that there's nothing wrong with you. You are not behind. You just need to start from where you're at. You can't change what's happened in the past, but you are super available to be in the driver's seat and determine how the future plays out, and you earn good money, so you are in this position of real power now you can take back your power. You can feel empowered by deciding what it is that you want to do, because the woman who earns good money but still feels broke at the end of the week. Is not irresponsible. She's just overloaded. She's carrying the mental load for the business, for the family, for everything, and you've just been trying to make money alone.
And so here's what I want you to do next. I want you to come and join my free five day challenge. It's the rich girl's money reset. It's short, structured, and it's really designed to give you that relief, fast, without the spreadsheets, without the shame, without the jargon, but really in a supportive and collaborative space, because I know that when women get together, we are inspired by those around us, so come together in the collective, in the community to be able to really up level your relationship with money. Because these five days, I know, are a game changer. And if you want the details, the links will be in the show notes. It's five days. There's no more hustle. You don't need to be hustling. You don't need to earn more money, but you actually need to be in control of the money that you have right now.
Thanks for tuning in today. I really hope you enjoyed the show. If you did, head over and subscribe and also leave me a review while you're there, I would love to read it. Don't forget to share this episode with your audience and tag me on Instagram at @erindavismoney If you need any more info from today's show, head over to www.erindavis.com.au/podcast where you'll find all of today's show notes and links. See you next week on the Erin Davis show.